T--l--nd's Invitation to DISMAL, to Dine
        with the Calves-Head Club.

      Imitated from Horace, Epift. 5. Lib. 1.

IF, deareſt Diſmal, you for once can Dine
Upon a ſingle Diſh, and Tavern Wine,
T—l—nd to you this Invitation fends,
To eat the CALVES-HEAD with your truſty Friends.
Suſpend a while your vain ambitious Hopes,
Leave hunting after Bribes, forget your Tropes :
To morrow We our Myſtick Feast prepare,
Where Thou, our lateſt Preſelyte, ſhalt ſhare :
When We, by proper Signs and Symbols tell,
How, by Brave Hands, the Royal TRAYTOR fell ;
The Meat ſhall repreſent the TYRANT's Head,
The Wine, his Blood, our Predeceſſors ſhed :
Whilſt an alluding Hymn ſome Artiſt ſings,
We toaſt Confuſion to the Race of Kings :
At Monarchy we nobly ſhew our Spight,
And talk what Fools call Treaſon all the Night.

Who, by Diſgraces or ill Fortune ſunk,
Feels not his Soul enliven'd when he's Drunk ?
Wine can clear up G--d--lph--n's cloudy Face,
And fill J——ck Sm——th with Hopes to keep his Place ;
By Force of Wine ev'n Sc--rb--r--w is Brave,
Hal-- grows more Pert, and S--mm--rs not ſo Grave :
Wine can give P—rt—d Wit, and Cl--v--nd Senſe,
M--t--g--e Learning, B--lt--n Eloquence :
Ch-----ly, when Drunk, can never loſe his Wand,
And L--nc--n then imagines he has Land.

My Province is, to ſee that all be right,
Glaſſes and Linnen clean, and Pewter bright ;
From our Myſterious Club to keep out Spies,
And Tories ( dreſs'd like Waiters ) in Diſguiſe.
You ſhall be coupled as you beſt approve,
Seated at Table next the Men you love.
S—nd—d, Or—rd, B—l, and R—ch—d's Grace
Will come ; and H---mp--- ſhall have W---p---l's Place.
Wh-----n, unleſs prevented by a Whore,
Will hardly fail, and there is room for more :
But I love Elbow-room whene're I drink,
And honeſt Harry is too apt to ſtink.

Let no Pretence of Bus'neſs make you ſtay,
Yet take one Word of Counſel by the way :
If Gu—rn—y calls, ſend word you're gone abroad ;
He'll teaze you with King Charles and Biſhop Laud,
Or make you Faſt, and carry you to Prayers :
But if he will break in, and walk up Stairs,
Steal by the Back-door out, and leave him there ;
Then order Squaſh to call a Hackney Chair.              January 29.

SI potes archaicis conviva recumbere lectis,
Nec modica cœnare times olus omne patella :
Supremo te ſole domi. Torquate, manebo.

Mitte leves ſpes, & certarmina divitiarum,
Et Moſchi caufam : Cras nato Cæfare feſtus
Dat veniam ſomnumque dies: impune licebit
Æſtivam fermone benigno tendere noctem.

Quid non ebrietas defignat? operta recludit ;
Spes jubet eſfe ratas ; in prælia trudit incrmem :
Sollicitis animis onus eximit ; addocet attes.
Fœcundi calices quem non fecere diſertum?
Contracta quem non in paupertate ſolutum ?
Hæc ego procurare & idoneus imperor, & non
Invitus ; ne turpe toral, ne fordida mappa !
Corruget nares, ne non & cantharus & lanx
Oftendat tibi te ; ne fidos inter amicos
Sit qui dicta foras eliminct : ut coeat par
Jungaturque pari, Brutum tibi Septimiumque,
Et nifi cœna, prior potiorque puella Sabinum
Detinet, aſſumam, locus eſt & pluribus umbris:
Sed nimis arcta premunt olidæ convivia capne.
To quotus eſſe vclis reſcribe : & rebus omiſſis,
Atria fervantem poſtico falle clientem.