THE

    Countryman's GARLAND;

                  In Two PARTS.

            To a Merry New TUNE

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Part I. Country JOHN's unfortunate Ramble to
    London ; Or, The Tricks of a Town Jilt.

YOU young men that down in the country dwell,
Come liſten a while ro my ſong, ſir,
While my ſad misſortunes to you I do tell,
Pray do not think the time long, ſir.
I liv'd in the country as ſweet as a toſe,
One day in a hurry I pack'd up my cloaths,
My beſt fine doublet, my hat and my hoſe,
And away came trudging to London,
When I came to London, that famous fine place,
I view'd the ſteeple ſo high, ſir,
Such I ne'er ſaw before in all my days,
Lord how they did hallow and cry, fir
Here are fine ſnuff-boxes fit for your noſe,
Some crying artichoaks, others old cloaths,
I thought at firſt they'd been calling their cows,
They made ſuch a racket in London.
But as I flood flaring with the trunk at my back,
Being both cold, wet, and weary,
One came up to me, and aſk'd what I lack'd,
She was drcſt up as fine as a lady.
I tu'rn'd me round, and look'd her in the fact,
Dear madam, ſaid I, I do want a place,
She ſmil'd upon me with a ſimpering grace,
And bid me right welcome to London.
She ſaid, In the country I have a good friend,
That wants one to wait at the table,
If you'll flay awhile I for him will ſend,
And do for you what I am able.
Strait into a tavern away the did pack,
I ſollow'd her cloſe with my trunk at my back,
She call'd her maid Betty, like wiſe her man Jack,
They both bid me welcome to London.
Miſs Betty cry'd Madam, you know I am fickly,
Therefore, if John is but willing
To carry this baſket, he'll come again quickly,
For his pains I will give him a Chilling.
My brains being drowned in brandy and ſack,
She hoiſted the baſket upon my poor back,
And both together thro' the city did pack,
I thought it rare living in London.

She went by my ſite demure as a woiſe,
Did ever man ſee ſuch a whore, in,
She carry'd me down to the Conſtable's houſe,
I rapt at the door, and the Conitable came,                 ;
I look'd over my ſhoulder, but Betty was gone,
Then I wiſh'd myſelf fate out of London.
Said I,Here's a preſent, he ſaid Who ſent it !
At that I begin to look blue, ſir ;
It's no matter, ſaid I, with my pains I'm content,
But he cry'd out, That will not do, ſir.
He pulled a painted ſtaff out of his pocket,
And about my ears he did uſtily knock it,
Betides he call'd me ſaucepare and blockhead,
And this I got by coming to London,
The baſket was ty'd up as fast as might be,
Which added much to my vexation ;
And in it indeed was a pretty young babe,
Which put the nam into a paſſion.
A pot full of pottage he threw in my Eyes,
The People did hollow, the Baſtard did cry,
And I wiſh'd myſelf ſafe in my own country,
I was weary of living in London.
I went to the Tavern, the Place where 1 drank,
But Neighbours, if you will believe me,
The Lady was gone, and ſo was my Trunk,
Thought I, the Devil go with thee.
This put me into a paſſionate Rage,
I loft all my Cloaths and ſeven Years wage,
This I got by coming to London.
The very next morning, without any dodging,
My troubles came thickerand falter,
I to Bridewell was ſentto beat Hemp for my Lodg
To maintain My ſelf and my Baſtard.         (ing

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And then for a twelvemonth I daily did beg,
'Till I had neither ſtocking or ſhoe to my Leg,
With the Brat at my Back I was forced to beg,
And this I got by coning to London.

Part It. The Jilt paid in her own Coin ; Or
Country JOHN's Revenge for the Trick fire
had played him.

ONE Day as I was begging in Biſhepſgate Street,
It being ſad rainy weather,
There with Mrs. Betty I happen'd to meet,
And the old Whore both together.
Now I'll be revenged on theſe old Whores,
For tois was the time to pay off their Scores,
So followed them Home unto their own Doors,
For then I was acquainted with London.
Thought I, my Purpoſe they ſhall oot prevent,
If they do, the Devil muſt be in it ;
Without more delay for the Conſtable I ſent,
And he came with his ſtaff in a minute.
I call'd for aſſiſtance, and feized them ſtrait,
And then to the People my tale did relate:
They laugh'd at my Frolick and pity'd my Fate.
And ſaid, I'd hard Fortune in London.
As the Conſtiable he was ſecuring thoſe Punks,
Dear Neighbours, as I am a Sinner,
I ſtep'd in the Chamber, and there ſtood my Trunk,
It wis placed juſt under the Window ;
My Cloaths was gone and my Money likewiſe,
But believe me, I met with a much better Prize
It was full of good Linnen, Pinners, and Coiſs,
I thought it good Booty in London.
A Pair of Silk Breeches lay on the Shelf,
With a gold Watch and Rings in the Pocket ;
Said I, Theſe are like to fit none but myſelf,
So put them ſtrait under my jacket.
Both Top-knots and Laces I pillag'd good ſtore,
My Breeches were fill'd, I could cram in no more
While the Whores were ſcolding I ſlipt out of Door
And away I went jogging from London.
I ſcamper'd away as faſt as I was able,
To be going I was very willing,
The Beat I leſt lying under the Table,
Who cry'd like a Pig that was killing.
The Cooſtable ſerved his Warrants on them,
And unto New Bridewell hedid carry them,
And they may beat Hemp till the Devil ſetches them
For I'll never come more to London.
You young Men that live in the Country ſweet,
I'd have you to pleaſe your old Maſters,
And never go up to the City, for ſear
You meet with ſuch like diſaſters :
For London's as ſharp as the Edge of a Kniſe,
The City is fill'd with Faction and Strife,
Boys, nothing ſo ſweet as a Country Life,
Let thoſe that want Wit go to London.